In search for her

Cold

2009-05-19T03:00:00.000-07:00

I've became notable cold. I was so pleased to see that you've waved your shifted light to me the other day and I think this caused me to be so cold. I need to see you, because your rendered image is fading away. The captured image help me keepthe flame burning but I defenetly need to see you so that you fill up my energy level. If we just were in another world, without cats and whistles, I would have been different. However, we probably never got to know each other. Who knows?

Happiness

2009-05-18T03:00:00.000-07:00

Happiness was here and you were inside my thoughts the whole time and aftewards when you should be the one. Guilt maybe, but sorrow for sure. I feel like I'm stepping away from you everytime and I don't have the power to fight back, I just go with the stream, far from you. I'm falling back and there's nothing I can hold on to. I miss you look and the lack of it made me weaker, able to fall for local happiness. I wish I coul see your eyes watching me more aften.

Silence

2009-05-17T03:00:00.000-07:00

You are silent

Happiness is loud

I want to hear your silence

Whispering around

You are not here

Happiness is near

I want to see your shadow

Wrapping aroud me

You are almost unreal

Happiness is boring

I'm dreaming at you

I want you to be real

Real like a sunshine

Closer than my shadow

I need to feel your whisper

In beam of every morning

Patience

2009-05-16T03:00:00.000-07:00

I must be patient and let the whole storm go away. Analyize the output of my external and internal sensors. Take proper measures so that I won't fail out of my stupidy. The road seems clear now and it's only a matter of time. Time I have, but I need patience with my current happiness and I don't know how much will be until it will crack and who knows what can come from the other side. Bad things, I presume. Today, your shifted light reached my detector and I started deconvoluting the signal. Caution, closer, patience, virtues I like and cherrish.

Journey to infinity

2009-05-15T03:00:00.000-07:00

I gaze upon your image and soul, trough a distorted dark mirror. I can see and hear you using a shifted daylight that carries your pulsating signal. My heart becames a quasar that dances with your shifted beam of light, in a resoanance tango towards the distant starts. Your eyes will guide and clean my tired and dirty soul trough the universe, in an attempt to reach alternate realites, far from current happiness, far from current plane of existence, far from every world and every star I know. Our speed will be fuelled my your touch and we will self eject from this boring universe, towards our own magnificent and unique world. Talk to me, just talk to me.

Mirror, mirror on the wall

2009-05-14T03:00:00.000-07:00

Her image is blurred by reality who struggles to reach the surface. Fine balance of alternative and imaginative is almost breached once again by turmoil in the real scene. I'm standing on the edge of a cracked mirror and I could easily choose to fall into either side. It's not a magic mirror. It's a real world. The chaotic wind of change push me, but I struggle not to let go a chance. Imagination and hope must be kept alive, no matter what. Doubt, another piece of you, joins my collection. I long to miss your eyes.

Empty shell

2009-05-13T03:00:00.000-07:00

Happiness is here, but I cannot enjoy it. I feel my soul dissovled and my true happiness went away, in another eyes and from another breath, generated by the touch of another hair. I look at her and see myself as an empty shell, ready to crack. Long ago, there was love, but who knows what love really is? It must have been love, but it's over now. It's just a shell. An empty shell, like my heart. Hungry from you, longing for your touch.

I never really touch you, but I miss your skin.

Wind of doubt

2009-05-12T03:00:00.000-07:00

She is forcing me to reconsider all my previous defintions and my entire status. To redefine my boundaries and my happiness. She is taking control over my inner thoughts, leading me to scenarios out of my routine. She is here to stay.

A crisis, generated by a phase tarnsition in my internal structure, maybe be near, with unpredictable results.

The future is changed now. I see it in another light. And she is there, giving the light.

The beginning. And why?

2009-05-11T03:00:00.000-07:00

This is my online dream about a beautiful young lady.

There she was, standing across the table, watching me wathcing her. It was love at first sight, from the first second I saw her incredible eyes. I dind't care about anything, but her eyes. I haven't see her for a long time since, but keep thinking at her. I became happy in the mean time, but how do you define happiness? This is not the first time I create visual representantion that I tend to care about, but this lasted too much. True happiness is the pursuit of happiness.

There you are, like a foam, surrounding my thoughts, never letting me go. I will continue writting about you, until I'll completly find you. Piece by piece, day by day, atom by atom, I will keep searching and collecting feelings about you.